there's no room in my bed as far as i'm concerned

hottie clerk @ the courthouse: "hi can i help you?"

me: "i really hope so, i went to get my issue resolved but they told me i'd still have a hold on my license." 

(i got a ticket the night of my accident for not showing my registration card, 

i know, shitty, right? 

like yeah sorry your car is totaled but don't feel too bad, here's a ticket.)

hottie clerk: "yeah, those usually take a few days to clear up."

me: "that's what the guy at the payment window said, 

but the problem is i'm about 600 miles away from anyone i know, so i can't go home."

hottie clerk: "i'd give you a ride"

me: i just looked at him with my mouth open a bit

hottie clerk: here i'll take care of it for you.

(combined with a borderline inappropriate  smile)

me: thanks...

and that was how my court visit ended.

i didn't hate it.

i don't hate these either... they're actually my favorites.

or court ordered therapy sessions.

i cough for no man.

playing hard to get is overrated.

motherfucker would burn shit down.

so much for the magic of jesus' love.

i smile more when i belong.

nobody puts baby in a corner.

those beady black eyes haunt my dreams.

also, gas prices are rising at an alarming rate.

i can contain it... if i have to.

subtlety is my forte.

fool me once, shame on you...

so no web slinging then?

no justice. no peace.

who took the cookies from the cookie jar? YOU DID MOTHER FUCKER!

and verbal agreements are only legally binding in the state of nevada.

three cheers for accomplishing goals.

WE CAN AFFORD NO MORE DISTRACTIONS!!

good luck with things.

fuck you bernie goldman.

too far?

ninety-eight, ninety-nine, one hundred. totally worth it.

i don't judge your hobbies.

i told him the black one always dies first.

famous last words?

drop outs have the most fun.

the earth is our mother, we will not bury her.

a stranger is a just a friend you haven't met.

and tonight is a good TV night.